Don't step on my Bluetspur Shoes
Session Twenty-Three - Plants vs Zombies.
Plants vs Zombie flashbacks
Ethan gives us 30 tokens to spend on town defences. Defences are as follows:
| Cost | Description |
|---|---|
| Walls. These will give us an additional d4 when calculating peon losses. | |
| 5 | Potion Crafting. Craft any single potion. |
| 4 | Morale Boost. A fine feast before the battle, giving all PCs 3d6 temp HP. |
| 3 | Choke Point. Cover a 20 foot square with caltrops. |
| 3 | Defensive Stronghold. Make an area give PCs in it +2AC and gives disadvantage on ranged attacks against them. |
| 2 | Armament Supplies. Allows PCs to re-roll one damage dice once per turn. |
| 2 | Construct Tower. Gives PCs in it +2 on ranged attacks. |
| 1 | Build Trap. Build a trap that covers a 20 foot square. |
| 1 | Refine Resources. Increase the DC of traps. |
Rule Augmentation (Argumentation?)
Dan successfully argued that by using the ability of Bigby’s Benificent Bracelet to create force sculptures, he should be able to reduce the cost of Walls from 8 to 5.
We also encased the shard in a shard condom made of a force sculpture. Originally it was a force shell, or cupboard, but Ethan has trouble with those concepts, while he has an immediate grasp of the concept of a condom. We thought it best not to ask. We then encased the entire thing inside a Leomund’s Tiny Hut with Rusty inside.
The specifics of traps were a bit free-form. With the exception of the bridge trap (which Rusty built), they were all based on spells that Rusty can cast. He was a busy boy, which is why he spent the battle resting with the shard.
Trap placement
| Number | Location | Trap Type | Perception DC | Trap DC |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Bridge | Pit - drops them into the river full of sharks | 23 | 17 (Dex) |
| 2 | Bridge Landing | Web trap | 22 | 19 (Dex) - 19 (Str) to escape |
| 3 | Fields - Row 1, Left | Random | Nat 20 | 19 (Dex or Con) |
| 4 | Fields - Row 1, Center | Random | 8 | 19 (Dex or Con) |
| 5 | Fields - Row 1, Right | Random | 26 | 19 (Dex or Con) |
| 6 | Fields - Row 2, Left | Random | 31 | 19 (Dex or Con) |
| 7 | Fields - Row 2, Center | Random | 26 | 19 (Dex or Con) |
| 8 | Fields - Row 2, Right | Random | 23 | 19 (Dex or Con) |
| 9 | Fields - Row 3, Col 1 | Random | 24 | 19 (Dex or Con) |
| 10 | Fields - Row 3, Col 2 | Random | 12 | 19 (Dex or Con) |
| 11 | Fields - Row 3, Col 3 | Random | Nat 20 (Disadv) | 19 (Dex or Con) |
| 12 | Fields - Row 3, Col 4 | Random | Nat 20 (Disadv) | 19 (Dex or Con) |
| 13 | In front of hall | Web trap | 22 | 19 (Dex) - 19 (Str) to escape |
| 14 | In front of hall | Web trap | 22 | 19 (Dex) - 19 (Str) to escape |
| 15 | In front of hall | Web trap | 22 | 19 (Dex) - 19 (Str) to escape |
Random Traps are determined when tripped as follows:
| Roll on d6 | Trap Type |
|---|---|
| 1 - 2 | 3d8 Thunder. Shatter spell - CON save, 10’ R |
| 3 - 4 | 8d6 Fire. Fireball spell - DEX save, 20’R |
| 5 - 6 | 8d6 Lightning. Lightning Bolt - DEX save |
Other equipment
Placed at the end of the bridge, and in front of the hall containing the shard, we build a Tower that also has the Defensive Stronghold characteristics. We also build walls in an attempt to keep the villagers alive.
Pre-fight checklist
We ask the Hedgehog Knights to see if they can track down Gehry the Giant, or Gundrin Rockseeker.
We also explain to the Sahaugin about the impending invaders and how they were terrible people. They got on board, and herded all their sharks up the river. That improved the effectiveness of the bridge trap significantly.
Rusty uses his shiny new class ability to turn a screwdriver into a spell-storing item that can cast Shatter 10 times, which he gives to Louie to use.
The Captain has a visitor
The Captain was working on hiding one of the traps outside when he noticed a second shadow near him, whose height remained constant, but it’s width oscillated. Immediately on guard, he turns invisible, hiding his own shadow. His second shadow also disappears. The Captain heads indoors, and drops invisibility. He spots in a handy mirror a coin in the air, spinning.
The door opens, and a 9’ tall, lanky but powerful figure saunters in. He is wearing blue pauldrons that match the colour of his eyes, and slinky tight trousers, but not much else. His hair is ashy white. He closes the door behind him, and pulls up a seat, never breaking eye contact with The Captain. Is it getting steamy in here?
He says: “You are a stranger in these lands, but you have done nothing but protect my land and its people since you arrived. You slaughtered the lycanthropes and other abominations that threatened these lands. I have not seen anyone with such a spine in some time.” It is getting steamy in here! He continues: “You would have noticed that I have given you tokens.” The Captain notes that he has noticed. It is noted that he noted that he noticed.
The stranger says: “I want Vilgax dead, and I believe you and your friends can do this. Do not let Vilgax get the obelisk, because then my power will wane.” The Captain immediately swears an oath to stop Vilgax. The stranger continues: “I am a huge fan, and I am very interested to see what you do next.” They shake hands. “You may call me Bane.” Bane winks and glances at the table. When The Captain looks, there is a ebon-black bow resting there. It has multiple strings, and continuously releases wisps of smoke, as if it is almost on fire. When fired, it plays a musical tone. (It is a Bow of Melodies, see the item description for details)
Dennis finally has that Psychotic break we’ve all been expecting
Dennis was finishing a Watch Tower, when everything freezes. He suddenly gets a migraine, then he finds himself in a padded cell, surrounded by hooded and masked figures. The migraine pain seems to emanate from behind his ears, so he checks to see if anything is there - and does find a hair-fine thread of something underneath the skin.
The hooded figures advance, so Dennis stuns the one in front and rips off its mask. The face of a Mind Flayer is revealed, which has damaging effects on Dennis’ mind. Having satisfied himself that the target is EVIL, he averts his eyes slightly and keeps punching. The Mind Flayer, in so far as it can be said to display emotion, merely appears to be curious and satisfied to be part of the experiment. The other Mind Flayers merely observe. When the lead Flayer drops, a voice is heard to say “Experiment successful. Genetic markers identified and extracted.” Dennis doesn’t give a shit about that, and prepares to move on to the next victim target, but the vision vanishes and Dennis finds himself back atop the Tower he was building.
Blackrazor gets hangry
Louie was hiding a marsh trap, while Raymond was killing insect with Blackrazor. Louie notices that Raymond is acting oddly, and appears to be having an internal debate about killing some villagers. His eyes turn black, and he turns to Louie and throws an epic hissy fit (as Blackrazor) about how he is hungry, and Louie should bring him a villager to eat once per day. Louie confers with the rest of the party before a decision is reached - nut up or shut up. The alternative will be use discarding Blackrazor, which we will do by tossing him into the nearby volcano. Sure, it won’t destroy it, but it will spend a very long time without food before anyone gets it out again.
Blackrazor is apparently unhappy about that. Suck it up, you baby.
Braveheart time
A bunch of inspirational speeches are then given by all. The one to the Sahaugin included a Dolly Parton/Kenny Rogers duet.
We’re done. It’s been 2 1/2 hours!
In the distance, an approaching army is seen. The time is upon us!
We are the Plants. The Zombies approach.
Well, not zombies - they appear to be goblin-like creatures with weird growths coming off them. There are about 75 of them, split into 3 companies of 25 each. The Captain decides to test the extreme range of his bow, and we see the arrow disappear into the distance.
Shortly afterward, the goblins approach the bridge - one of them sporting an arrow protruding from its eye. They begin to shriek, which causes disadvantage on saving throws and advantage to attack the characters, if we are able to hear it - so we have to make perception checks at the start of each turn to see if we can hear the shrieks over the rain. If we succeed, we suffer the effects.
Initiative! Dennis comes out on top with 27, The Captain next with 18, then goblin groups 1 & 2, then Louie (14), then the last group of goblins.
Round 1
Dennis flies forth from the tower, kills 5 goblins in group 1, and flies back to the tower.
The Captain uses his fancy new bow to good effect and kills another 4 - with 2 arrows. Nice!
The first company crosses the bridge, and while it doesn’t spot the trap, it also doesn’t trigger it. Everybody has a go at remotely triggering it, which proves harder than expected, but eventually The Captain causes it to go off, dropping the first company of goblins into the river where they are mauled by sharks. They drag themselves out the other side, and immediately walk into the Web trap, where they remain stuck for the remainder of the night.
Group 2 climb across the sides of the bridge, and start climbing the tower to get to the characters. They try to hit Dennis (miss), then Louie (miss), then Raymond (miss).
Louie uses the shatter-driver Rusty gave him, doing 11 damage to every member of group 2.
Group 3 bypasses the tower entirely and heads into town. They walk straight into a lightning trap, then a shatter trap.
Round 2
Dennis flies off to head off group 3, and beats them up a bit, then hovers 40 feet above them. Group 3 is now down to 22 members left, of the original 25.
The Captain moves to the side of the tower and uses his bow to hit the goblins of group 1, doing a critical. Then he hits again, no critical this time but still 42 HP of damage. Group 1 is down to 10 members remaining of the original 25.
Oriana joins the fight and damages group 2.
Group 2 attacks Louie and crits (50 damage).
Louie swings back at Group 2 and does a crit (73 damage) and again - no crit, but still 23 damage. Group 2 is now down to 8 members left of their original 25.
Raymond hits group 2 for 12 damage, and again for 14.
Group 3, unable to reach Dennis, now tear bits off themselves and throw them into a pile. the pile roils and undulates and turns into something that resembles a drowned corpse. The corpse then vomits up a pile of purple stuff, which spawns 3 figures - one “seer”, and 2 “bruisers”. The bruisers can fly - but it isn’t flying, it’s something else. They both fly up and have a go at Dennis. They also appear to be mimicking Dennis’ abilities, because one of them stuns him, causing him to fall to the ground.
Round 3
Dennis un-stuns himself, and hits the seer - but the strike causes the seer to disappear, and the damage is transferred to one of the hulks, who is paralyzed. But remains flying. Dennis only has 25 feet of movement left, so cannot reach any other targets, and goes back to flying - this time 25 feet up.
The Captain shoots the Hulk that is paralyzed, but because he’s not in melee, doesn’t get an automatic critical.
Group 1 is still stuck in the web.
Group 2 takes a swing a Louie but misses.
Louie hits Group 2 twice - it’s now down to 2/5, or 10 members remaining of the original 25. So, somehow, it’s members went up.
Raymond hits group 2, but then “accidentally” hits Louie for breathtaking damage. Blackrazor then says something snide about how easy it would be to “accidentally” feed it a villager during combat. That sword has now sealed its very hot, hungry fate.
Hulk 2 flies over to Dennis and hits him. It takes all of Dennis’ inspiration to succeed on the save. The seer tries to telekinetically pull the shard to himself. The shard that is sealed in a force condom, inside a Leomund’s Tiny Hut, which no magic can pass through. He looks confused when it doesn’t work.
It’s late - we’ll come back next week.
Post-match Summary.
| Group 1 | Group 2 | Group 3 | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Round 1 | Lost 5(Dennis)+4(Captain)+?(Sharks). Webbed in between tower and bridge. | Lost 11HP to every member by Louie. | Bypassed tower, hit lightning trap, then shatter trap. Down to 22/25 |
| Round 2 | The Captain does damage - down to 10/25. | Oriana, Louie and Raymond damages them - down to 8/25. | Group 3 sacrifices itself to create 2 Bruisers and 1 Seer. |
| Round 3 | Remains stuck in web. | Louie hits Group 2, causing their numbers to increase to 10/25. | Hulk 1 is stunned, Hulk 2 hit Dennis, Seer tried to get shard but failed. |
So, Group 1 is trapped in the web and down to 10 members. They sound like great targets for the militia’s ranged attacks. Group 2 is attacking the tower, and is down to either or 10 members. Raymond, Louie, Oriana the Captain are all in the tower. Group 3 is a Seer and 2 Hulks now. The Seer is between Dennis and the town hall. The Hulks and Dennis are at the inner tower.